12/12/09

A News Director's Swan Song
Written by Charles Potter

The Book of Ecclesiastes says there's a time for all things. It's time for this reporter to accept new challenges and opportunities.

No one wants the end to come. But the end has come for this reporter. That's because he doesn't want to follow the path that management has determined is the future.

Therefore, I have resigned from all employment with Prairie Radio Communications, effective immediately.

Several months ago, management said we aren't making money because the on air staff is just average. As I looked at the seven first place awards I had just won, I penned a poem which admittedly isn't great poetry. And I haven't made it public -- until now.

I've won lots of honors and lots of awards
For covering car wrecks and fires and school boards.
My boss should be buying my favorite beverage,
But he scoffs and he snorts and he calls me just average.

I was hired for my voice a long time ago
Because it is clear and it's pitched very low.
But now it's called brutal and termed way too savage,
And my boss scoffs and snorts and he calls me just average.

I put in long hours with words and with sounds,
Combining my sound bites with verbs and with nouns.
I ask for few favors and don't expect privilege,
But my boss scoffs and snorts and he calls me just average.

A raise just won't happen, my boss will repeat.
"We're in a recession, so just cool your feet."
I try to provide him with excellent news coverage,
But he scoffs and he snorts and he calls me just average.

So I'll stay on my task, and I'll accept all my loss,
And they'll kick me upstairs and make me the big boss.
I'll sit at his desk and enjoy lots of leverage.
I know I'm well qualified because I'm only just average.

Thank goodness, they're not kicking me upstairs. I'm going out the door of my own accord while I still have some semblance of health and sanity.

They talk about meeting new challenges and opportunities. I agree. I'm looking forward to the challenge of another lifestyle change. I'm looking forward to the opportunity of spending more time with my long neglected family. I'm looking forward to the opportunity of spending more time at my long neglected piano tuning business. I'm looking forward to the opportunity of spending more time with the pipe organ at Zion Lutheran Church. And I'm looking forward to the opportunity of again being one of those early morning runners along Mulberry Avenue.

Thank you, Muscatine, for allowing me a great twelve year run at KWPC. For the final time, I'm Charles Potter reporting.